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What happens when you wake up one morning and your life is threatened?
You find yourself feeling like you have been thrown under a bus; that’s what. All of a sudden everything begins to spiral out of control – there is something trying to kill you and no one knows what it is. This is the second time in my life that this has happened, I know what you’re thinking……”what?!”
So what happens next?
Well I ended up at the emergency room, somebody help me written all over my face. How did something this small turn into something this big and so quickly? My face was swelling up by the second. I was in so much pain I could have hit every high note in an opera. I was terrified of everything and everyone around me, its safe to say that I was not feeling relaxed.
I ended up finally being seen by a Doctor; by this point I’d had so many holes poked in me looking for a viable vein that I thought that the nurse was about to win tickets at a fair. I had watched my own life’s blood shoot across the room twice, if that was not a good attempt I don’t know what is. I wanted to hand the woman a pink fluffy bear and say Well done!
I was admitted
I felt like I was being committed, rather. I was transferred via ambulance to a little private hospital where I would await my fate…..
The ambulance was very small inside and think I now know how a sausage feels when it first enters its packaging.
It was agonising waiting to see the Surgeon. Yes; I was going to be seen by a bloody Surgeon of all people. This was apparently not a job for some small-fry Doctor; not any more! My heart was pounding in my feet, my face was trying to strangle me ever so slowly at the same time. Why is this happening to me?! my mind was screaming as he walked in the door.
I was evaluated
He did not know what it is!
I was put on some really strong IV antibiotics and pain medication and he took the “wait and see” approach……..
Call me stupid, but this seldom works. A mole-rat could tell you this and he would be right on the money.
“Are you any better yet?”
“Um…..NO,” I said. I think I was trying to smile at this point but I’m sure I was grimacing.
So he wrote up a script to have an ultrasound…
You see; when you don’t know what something is… it’s always best to ask somebody else…..
I could not sleep a wink, this thing was getting bigger and bigger and the alien was about to pop out of me any second! The pain medication was like falling down a flight of stairs; when you first lunge forward you think you can fly, but in a very short while you hit the ground and everything is screaming in agony and you think you are dead.
The nurses had temperaments of jail wardens. Never in my life did I feel like more of a pain in someone else’s ass. You know; when you hear the saying “go big or go home” well, my face was really big but I just wanted to go home.
I was in no such luck and the little ambulance arrived a second time to cart me off to Radiology. To anyone who has never had something trying to erupt from their face will not know how it feels to be stared and gawked at by queues of people. I felt like I was the bearded lady in a special guest appearance, in a show no one wanted to miss. I had not had pain medication in too many hours and I had to take a seat in waiting room full of people. The rare hideous insect in a jar…. this was me and I was being studied.
After finally having the ultrasound done I had to wait for the little sausage van to come and pick me up. I’d not had a cigarette in three days and I ended up bawling my eyes out and dragging harder on one in the parking lot like my life depended on it. The news was not good and the alien would be removed the very next day…..
I was going to have surgery! (insert screams here)
I had by now not slept in so long that I was beginning to forget what I’d forgotten. The pain was so bad I wanted to grapple somebody into doing it and no I did not care who they were. I’d not been able to eat solids in three, going on four days. I was exhausted and at my most miserable I have ever been in my entire life and I wanted to choke slam a nurse for a smoke. Terrified is not the word to use in this situation for what I was feeling only has scribbles to express its true meaning.
Sixteen bags of antibiotics had unleashed themselves into my body and had done absolutely nothing. This was a job for a scalpel and there was no avoiding it…..
I was wheeled out of my room and taken to the place that is feared more often than hell. This alien was not going to let me out of its grips alive.
I flat-lined on the table and they brought me back. I had faced my biggest fear and the alien had been ripped from my face; I WAS ALIVE!!!!!!
I came around gasping for air feeling like I’d just conquered the world. I had conquered death and I lived.
I found courage on the table that day; courage at a second chance at life I almost never had.
Small victories can be found in the rarest of places. Broken crayons still colour.
Be triumphant always.